Sunday, June 25, 2017

This possible future of mine


If we want to understand why people take their lives then it is to their words, visions or lack of, spells and incarnations we might look to understand.
A very, very close and extremely loved friend wrote the following piece before taking her life. 


This possible future of mine with no partner and not children, is not the future I envision for myself. It is not what I would choose for myself either. But its seems that it is something I have to accept.

It would be nice if I had the first clue about how to go about that!

I have reached a point where I can see that all over the world all the time people are coming to terms with a life that is not part of the plan, Learning to live with disease, with sudden poverty, with the loss of a child or partner. So I know that this isn't unique to me. which is something. Advance ye soul.

I think that I can accept. I'm not sure that I am ready to make peace. And until I do that I don't know that I will be able to live comfortably. Acceptance only goes so far to create a sense of well-being in ones life. Especially when it's kinda grudging and involves lots of flailing about crying 'why me' and so on. Hokay. Sigh. So for the learning.

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